Between Halloweens

"It's not the girl who we let tear through our core
It's the tear there before that made this girl into more

Skin white sheets
The dawn's printless snow
Nothing to define the difference
Just lit lips under a flame of curls
Many a prince has since us blown dark

But it's not the girl who we let tear through our core
It's the tear there before that made this girl into more
It's not the girl who we let tear through our core
It's the tear there before that made this girl into more

We'll make mistakes in the wake of mistakes
But not wake again to this one
When looks fade we'll still reflect in verse
She'll dissolve to apparition
Slight from stark
Once light, now blown dark

But it's not the girl who we let tear through our core
It's the tear there before that made this girl into more
It's not the girl who we let tear through our core
It's the tear there before that made this girl into more

She don't deserve love
She'll get what she's deserving of
We don't deserve love
We'll get what we're deserving of
I don't deserve love
You'll get what you're deserving of
We all get what we're deserving of

But it's not the girl who we let tear through our core
It's the tear there before that made this girl into more
It's not the girl who we let tear through our core
It's the tear there before that made this girl into more

I was a duke last Halloween
This year, gonna be James Dean
Just wish I knew who we are in between"

- The Matches

I don't know why but this song keeps coming to my mind. I guess it is not specifically the line "It's not the girl who we let tear through our core.
It's the tear there before that made this girl into more." but is has so much truth to every situation. Like what has been happening lately... there are always outside forces at work and the existing damage that made the current problem worse can not be over looked. Does that make sense at all? It does to me but I hope I am getting my point across clearly.

I am gonna start this new things and be mature and tell people actually how I feel. I am OK so don't worry and freak out on me. Haha Knowing y'all you'll be watching me very carefully for a while. I have been stressing about everything. I am terrified about moving in all honesty... I need to do it and I will be I have yet to reach deep down and fight the paralyzing fear with my "This is gonna be one heck of an adventure spirit!" I will find it... so don't worry. I just have to go through my process and I will be that "happy go lucky Emily again" :) I love you all! Don't worry... seriously. Haha yeah this blog is more of the workings of the deep dark corners of my soul ;) Yes I know I am a drama queen. Thank you for reading and caring.

Please stay tuned for the new adventures beginning in the next few weeks. Oh and If you have any feelings about my music selection (what I am missing or what there should be more of) let me know. I am feeling like it needs to be updated but would appreciate the input!

Merry Christmas :)

I love you all soooooo freakin' much! <3,

- M